One beautiful summer’s day my
regular crew for the GP14 hadn’t
turned up, so I was looking for
a replacement. The Sailing
Secretary introduced me to a new
member looking for a sail. I
told her that as it was such a
lovely day I had no intention of
racing round buoys. I was going
to sail out to the island and
back, a distance of about nine
miles.
My new crew was a
very presentable lass of about
twenty, who told me that she had
only been out sailing a couple
of time. I told her that with a
nice force three blowing and not
a cloud in the sky, we were sure
to have a pleasant sail. Taking
advantage of the truly summer
weather I was dressed in bathing
trunks and a loose shirt.
Isobel, my crew, changed from
her jeans into a very stylish
and brief bikini. A couple of
can of Coke were stowed away out
of the sun.
We set sail just on
1400 and the wind was giving us
a reach out to the island. It
couldn’t have been more
pleasant We chatted away,
giving each other a bit pf
background about each other. It
was all very relaxing.
We rounded the island
and had a can of Coke to
celebrate. The wind started to
die away and before long we
ended up with only the lightest
breath of wind –and that only
occasionally.
The sun continued to shine out
of a now cloudless sky. The sea
was calm with hardly a mark upon
it. A floating beer can could be
spotted at an incredible
distance. I discovered that my
healthy looking, scantily clad
companion, could tell which
brewery the can came from, long
before I could. She also knew
more brands than I did.
Time passed. We managed to keep
the boat moving – just- and
objects on the far shore slowly
became clearer.
It was after 1900 when we ran
the boat onto sand at the
Sailing Club and trotted up the
beach to get the launching
trolley. We happily told each
other how much we had enjoyed
the day and each others company.
A sharp, almost screeching voice
broke the evening quiet.
“Oh no!” said my crew-girl and
leaving me with the trolley in
thick sand, ran up to a car
parked at the Club.
I had managed to get
the dinghy and onto the trolley
but was making heavy weather of
pulling my load over the sand to
the dinghy park, when my crew
returned to help. She was
obviously upset and told me that
the elderly maiden aunts with
whom she lived, were in the car
and being very unreasonable
about us us being late. They had
noticed that everyone else had
left the Club. They couldn’t
understand why on such a lovely
day we were so late. They had
also mentioned the paucity of
both our clothing and that I was
old enough to be her father.
True! - but so what!!.
I started to make my
way towards the car as quickly
as I could through the heavy
sand. I would soon sort this
little matter out. But when I
saw the three grim faced old
harridans sitting there looking
at my progress- I realised that
it was a lost cause. As far as
they were concerned I was
tainted for life.
I chickened out and
went home and told my wife who
promptly laughed like a drain.
And I never saw Isobel
again.
Bill Mills
